Comics and posts about post-show talk | Bassist Wanted

What’s that called?

COREY BROWN: Hey, you sounded great up there. What was that called?

RONI: Well, my guitar solo used a scale called the Hungarian Minor (or Harmonic Minor #4). It has a large number of half steps and a slightly ambiguous tonal center.

COREY BROWN: I just sort of meant, "What's the name of the song?"
RONI: Oh.

RONI: I have no idea.

Self-published

JOEL: Hey, I really liked your set. I work for Hancock Records, maybe you all could come in some time.
INDIE ROCK DUDE: No thanks, man. We self-publish.

JOEL: Well, just think about it. We could get you recorded, get you in stores and get your music in front of a larger audience.

INDIE ROCK DUDE: We... HAVE recorded, the album's on iTUNES and we've got a nationwide fan club with over FOUR MILLION members.

JOEL: Can you just take my card? I'm supposed to give out 10 each night.
INDIE ROCK DUDE: Sure.

Parentheses in the title

JOHN: Smart bands have cool song titles. Like with parentheses. I wish we had songs with parentheses in the titles...
DAN: We have that one with a tilde.

JOHN: Which one?
DAN: The song about your GeoCities page.

JOHN: Oh yeah...

JOHN: That song did NOT age well.
DAN: No...

Eight measures

CHRISTINA: And... there. THAT'S 8 measures.

DAN: Oh wow, no, then I meant NOTES, not measures. "My solo will be 8 NOTES long" is what I meant to say.

CHRISTINA: OK, well... anyway.

CHRISTINA: That's why we were all staring at you on stage.

Audience hate = respect

JOHN: ...and if you get another guitar, we can even do the thing where we make the audience wait while you switch them.

DAN: Don't they hate that?
JOHN: Audience golden rule: what they HATE, they RESPECT.

DAN: Even that night at Rockwood? That was all... respect.
JOHN: Oh, totally. TOTAL respect.

DAN: Even that old handicapped woman?
JOHN: Well, yeah, you gotta, y'know, read between the fistfights.

The Ninth Encore

DAN: Hey... the first encore was pretty good, right?
JOHN: Oh sure. Our acoustic cover of "War Pigs" was transcen-friggin'-dental.

DAN: The ninth encore was a little much though, huh?
JOHN: Hard to say.

DAN: I mean, I sort of liked playing with the house lights on.
JOHN: Hey, when d'you think someone'll be back to unlock the place? Noon?

Post-show with Kevin Edo

KULA: Great show tonight, Kevin. Now this tour is for a live album, right?
KEVIN EDO: Yeah. But we're not playing or singing live during the shows.

KEVIN EDO: So the album'll be live recordings of pre-recorded songs, with a little crowd noise in the background.

KEVIN EDO: We charge people for CDs, we charge them to hear the same recordings at our shows, and now we'll charge them to hear their own damn clapping.

KEVIN EDO: It's either interesting conceptual art... or a really dick thing to do. Either way, it'll be out in September. Listerine strip?
KULA: No... no thanks.

Office people after the show

MARCY: Great job, Veronica! The others from the office had to catch the 1:15 train, but they got to see your first song.
JOHN: Roni, you KNOW this jackass who kept jumping on stage?

CAL: I am a golden god!!
JOHN: Yeah, you almost had a golden goddamned lawsuit on your hands, pal.
MARCY: We better get going, Veronica. Young man: you have a nice voice.

JOHN: Oh... hey, thanks.
RONI: Bye Marcy. Bye Cal.

JOHN: So what's her story? Single?
RONI: Yes, John, she's 68, recently widowed and ready to mingle.

The show was good or horrible

JOHN: No way! It was a horrible show! We messed up 3 of 4 songs!
DAN: But we got free drinks, John! 2 each! And they were totally strong, too.

JOHN: Dan, man, the acoustics in there made us sound like a God damn jug band....
DAN: But there were people there, man. Almost 15! 2 of 'em were even girls!

JOHN: That did not go unnoticed, dude. The chickfactor was huge.
DAN: I winked at one of them, but that was right before I fell off trhe stage.

JOHN: Yeah, that was more unfortunate. You need to be more aware of your amp, dude....
DAN: Still, she helped me back up. Definite vibe-age.

When do we get to be rock stars?

JOHN: We've played clubs around here for years. We've paid our stupid dues. Where's our record deal? Where's our groupies? When do we get to be rock stars?

DAN: I got recognized by a waitress at Denny's last night.
JOHN: Yeah? You get the food for free?

DAN: No. But I felt like she gave me more little jelly packets than normal.

JOHN: Too much jelly. OK... OK, sure. "Decadence." See that's rock star, dude.
DAN: And she was, like, super quick with our free refills, too.