Comics and posts about groupies | Bassist Wanted

Mother/daughter groupies

JADE: What's the matter, Kevin?
KEVIN: There were this... pair of mother/daughter groupies at the after-party tonight...

KEVIN: The daughter was shooting up, and the mom helped her find a vein.

KEVIN: It was just... (sniff)... such a SWEET moment.
JADE: Sure... I knoe I still remember the first time I did a line off MY mom's butt.

KEVIN: Then they passed out, and the mom vomited, so we had security boot them.
JADE: Bummer...

Teaching a rock star to Twitter

TONY THE AGENT: So you just text or IM your updates to your Twitter account, and fans follow it so they can experience your day-to-day life.

TONY THE AGENT: I've been running it, but I think you should take it over now.
TONY THE AGENT: Seems easy enough... Oh SHIT. This kid... I KNOW this kid.

TONY THE AGENT: Christ, how'm I supposed to tell this kid I screwed his mom backstage at our show in Billings?

TONY THE AGENT: Well, you use the @ symbol, and then his username...
TONY THE AGENT: Oh, OK. This IS easy...

Grad school

KEVIN EDO: Um... I dunno if I "planned" to be a rock star. I mean... did you "plan" to do your job?
SEX TAPE STUDENT: Well, I go to grad school right now.

KEVIN EDO: Oh yeah? What for?
SEX TAPE STUDENT: I'm learning how to blackmail rock stars with sex tapes.

SEX TAPE STUDENT: Fucking you is part of my independent study course actually.

KEVIN EDO: So that's why you had me fill out this little survey.
SEX TAPE STUDENT: And can you sign this? My professor's a real timesheet Nazi.

Just needed a bit of DNA

DR. CARY: To clone these bands from the 80's, all we needed was a bit of their DNA. And it's never hard to find pieces of the world's most popular bands.

DR. CARY: Foreigner, for example, was recreated from hair grabbed by crazed groupies. The Cars from dandruff left on skinny ties. Gary Numan from dried saliva on moog keyboards.

JOEL: That's incredible.
DR. CARY: Incredible... and true.

JOEL: You're telling me Foreigner had "crazed groupies"?
DR. CARY: Yes, Joel, in 1985, we... we all wanted to know what love was....

Accept your groupie-ness

REYNOLDS: Ted. Admit it. You're a groupie for the Spinster Whores.
TED: I am not, dude! I'm just dating Karen, so... so I help out some...

REYNOLDS: Yeah, "dating". And before that you were "dating" Joanna... and before that, Cindy.
TED: So what?!

TED: We were in love! Each time! And I'm sorry if my love threatens you so much you have to call me a... a "groupie".

REYNOLDS: Dude, you run their damn merch stand for them...
TED: I am just helping!!!