Comics and posts about buying CDs | Bassist Wanted

How to tell when you graduated

DRM 9000: Out of curiosity, Greg, did you graduate college in 1999?
GREG: Yeah... how did you...?

DRM 9000: A simple bell curve analysis of the release dates of your music collection reveals a statistical peak from November '95 to March '99.

DRM 9000: Ergo... class of '99.
GREG: What? No... I've bought a ton of music since college, I... no...

DRM 9000: Your "Pavement/Shins Ratio" also puts you solidly in the '99 bucket.
GREG: Th-there's a Decemberists CD on my dresser! Make sure you counted that!!

Shower interruption

SONY GUY 1: Greg Trefry? We're with Sony BMG. You purchased a copy of a My Morning Jacket CD called "Z" a few months ago, yes?
GREG: Yeah... how'd you get in my apartment?

SONY GUY 2: Door was open.
SONY GUY 1: Your CD installed software on your computer without your knowledge.
GREG: Oh, the "rootkit" thing.... Wait, that door was locked.

SONY GUY 2: Lock was loose.
SONY GUY 1: We're apologizing to everyone affected. We care deeply about our criminals' privacy. Customers. I meant "our customers' privacy."

GREG: How long have you been here?
SONY GUY 2: Not long.
SONY GUY 1: You forgot to rinse after adding your conditioner, by the way.

First music you bought

GREG: Man, my dad just told me the first music he ever bought was Revolver!! Freakin' Revolver, man! So cool....

BRETT: Nice. What was your first?
GREG: I... I think it was a 45 of "Everybody Wang Chung Tonight."

BRETT: Good Lord.

BRETT: Look, if anyone else ever asks you that, just like and sat Surfer Rosa, dude....
GREG: It also might have been a cassingle of "Shoop"...

Buying a CD/consumer revolution

GREG: Do you know why I'm here in this damn Tower Records buying this album? Because I support this band. Because I believe in this band.

GREG: Because I want to be part of a full-scale consumer revolution that brings them to their rightful place as the kings of God damn rock n' roll!!!

CHLORIS: That'll be $18.99.
GREG: Do you take credit cards, my friend!?

BRETT: Can I burn that from you later?
GREG: Sure, man... make a copy for Kim, too.
CHLORIS: This is coming up as declined, sir.

Getting in the right bin

JOHN: Whoa whoa whoa.... Terry! How come our EPs are stocked in the "Local Music" section?
TERRY: Because you are a local band, John.

JOHN: No no no, Terry: we are a band, plain and simple! You move every single one of our EPs to "Rock/Pop" right now, man!!!
TERRY: OK! Fine, fine....

TERRY: There. Happy?

JOHN: "Misc. A"? You filed us in "Misc. A"? Why don't you just pick up that plastic tabbed divider and slit my throat, Terry!
TERRY: John... (sigh) I got displays to set up, man.