Office guy was in a band

PAT: So you're in a band, huh? I was in a band back in the day. Toured some with the Crue. Crazy times, man.
PAT: Once, on this wicked meth trip, I thought these two chicks WERE cymbals. I pulled a gun on our manager, made him beat them with drumsticks for hours while we mainlined paprika and cried.
PAT: Crazy times....
PAT: So anyway, I upgraded you to Word 2003. Now, there are a few changes you should know about....
RONI: OK....